When the kids were little, I felt like I never got a moment of peace. I was nursing, cleaning, doing laundry, making food, entertaining them, reading books. It. was. non. stop.
But now I’m looking back at photos and I see that my house was on point! I was letting my creative juices flow in between the cleaning and the breastfeeding, and it gave me life! I was painting my walls, refinishing furniture, or planting flowers and foliage in my beautiful garden. I busted out the power sander and made that Venetian Plaster I applied in the dining room shine like a mirror. Painted the kids room with a fairytale castle, forest and clouds covered the walls. I even covered the guest room/office completely in harlequin diamonds!
I painted with a baby strapped to my chest in an Ergo, gardened while the twins rolled around on a blanket on the grass, and I knew all about annuals and perennials. I was always covered in paint, and looking back in pics and videos I can see that my house was pretty damn organized, and my garden was completely fabulous.
I even mowed my own damn lawn, m’kay, people?
Is it possible that ADD can get worse with age?
I feel like all I do once they’re dropped off is put on my workout clothes (in case I get the urge to exercise (highly unlikely)), clean the house, do laundry, maybe edit some pics, run to the grocery store, and then suddenly it’s time to pick up the kids (from two different schools, mind you). I race the clock from one pick-up to the next and then after school activities, homework, dinner, bath time and then it’s time to collapse into bed and catch up on mindless TV.
This blog has not been updated in almost 4 years because I’ve been so busy. The irony of being too busy to write about my busy life does not escape me.
I will say that I personally seem to be a bit more pulled together than I was back then. I get a shower every day, so that’s a big step up… so there’s that.
A few weeks ago at about 8pm, Beatrix suddenly got hit with a high fever. I’m not sure how high it was actually because our thermometers are always missing or broken, thanks to the twins’ charming ability to hide/lose/destroy any and all useful objects in the home, but she was very hot. Not long after the fever began, she started breathing rapidly, got lethargic, shakey, vomited, and complained of a headache. That’s what got me; when she started saying “Mommy, my head hurts” over and over, I knew I couldn’t brush that off. So… at about midnight on a Sunday, I took her to the ER. We got in right away, and while we were checking in with the nurse, I realized her fever was totally gone, and I started wondering if she maybe wasn’t as sick as she’d seemed an hour earlier. I was happy, of course, that she seemed better, but there was a small part of me that wanted her to show some symptoms, damn it! Not in a Munchausen sort of way, but I knew that she had been sick an hour earlier, and that she would probably be sick again an hour after we got home- so, show the Dr.’s while we’re here so they can do their job, kid!
The nurse took her temperature and it was a very normal 98.7. REALLY?? I started to get mad at myself. Did I over react? After all, this has happened before with her older siblings when they were babies, and I told myself back then that I wouldn’t jump to conclusions with another sick kid again. I had taken Aurora to the ER as a baby when she seemed to be having trouble breathing during a bad cold, and when we got to the hospital, she too, was “FINE”. Alert and smiley, only a slight fever, and clear lungs. I know it’s better to be safe than sorry, but frankly, I feel bad for wasting the Dr.’s and nurses time, for looking like a loon, AND for costing us over $800 for a dose of tylenol and a nebulizer treatment. So, when Bea threw up some neon green bile in front of the nurse, I couldn’t help but be excited! See? She’s really sick! Then, yes, I realized how insane that was, and continued on with being the awesome mom who wants her kid to be healthy. Which I do, but, like I said; a little green bile barfing doesn’t hurt when I don’t want the Dr’s to think I’m a nutty, overreacting mom. They gave her a popsicle and she was suddenly, totally fine- and even insisted on walking down the hall herself to get her X-rays, all the while clutching said popsicle. Her lungs were mostly clear, and before long, we were sent on our way. Bea with a big, blue popsicle smile on her face. Well played, Bea, well played. I hope you enjoyed your $800 popsicle.
Traveling with 4 kids is no easy feat. We checked in fine, and it was nice to unload the giant bags and only have our four rolling carry-on bags, backpacks, stroller, car seats, and children to deal with. My biggest fears for this trip were security, and boarding. The actual flight and getting everybody off the plane and into the car was a concern, but I feel like checking bags and clearing security is such a hurdle, but once that’s behind us I can breathe a bit.
Going through security, at one point Tiffany was showing her ID behind me and a TSA agent asked me with great concern if I was alone with the kids because that’s what it looked like at the moment. She was very relieved for me when I told her that I did indeed have help. The kids were not required to take off their shoes through security-SCORE! I was able to quickly collapse the stroller and place it on the belt, the girls were very good listeners and they put their own bags on the belt, then held the babies hands for us on the side while we finished loading the belt with bags, car seat, shoes, etc. Nobody wanted to line up behind us, of course, but I must say, we were very efficient! We got through as quickly as possible, with no hang ups, and the security personnel were extremely cheerful and helpful, and the other passengers were very kind and friendly. Once we were through, we even got a big round of applause! It was awesome.
Once we got settled at the gate, I took the girls and Atticus with me to get some Starbucks. The line was a good 20 minutes long, but we made it through with coffee for me, and some juice, yogurt, donuts, and muffins, as requested by the girls… so I thought. Apparently Aurora wanted a chocolate muffin, but i got her a banana nut muffin and I couldn’t hear her because it was so loud but she didn’t make it really known until we were done with our transaction and walking out of Starbucks. Aurora is our middle child, and while she is a bright, wonderful, sweet, loving, happy child most of the time, she has a dark side that reared its ugly head once the twins were born and she had to compete for the attention that she once had in abundance… for which i have a lot of guilt mixed with frustration. So, sometimes when she doesn’t get her way, she has a complete “possessed-by-Satan” meltdown that nothing can stop once it’s started. Nothing.
So there I was, halfway out of Starbucks, baby strapped to me, Ariel by my side, hands full of coffee and baked goods, and Aurora begins to scream “I HATE BANANA MUFFINS!!! I WANT A CHOCOLATE MUFFIN!!!!!” Shit. I was essentially trapped because my hands were full. Tiffany was at our seats in the terminal with Bea and couldn’t hear us, everybody’s staring at the lady with all the kids and Starbucks coffee and bags, Aurora is crying, and screaming “NO! I WANT A CHOCOLATE MUFFIN NOW!!” across the terminal. I asked Ariel to hold the bags of food while I tried grabbing Aurora’s arm and coaxing her out of Starbucks but she wasn’t having it. It looked really bad. I could feel everybody’s eyes burning into me. I finally had no choice but to leave Aurora, run over to our seats and toss all the crap down next to Tiffany, leave Ariel with her with no time to remove Atticus from the Ergo because Aurora was now alone, screaming her tushie off in front of Starbucks, and I’m sure people were concerned and security wasn’t far from intervening. All I could think about was the family who was kicked off of a Jet Blue flight just the week before because their 2 year old was having a tantrum. I had been mostly worried about the twins, but they were being perfect, even Atticus who was strapped to me as I raced across the terminal! He happily bounced along with me, a little confused, but just enjoying the ride. I finally got back to Aurora and picked her screaming little body up, and carried her into a bathroom stall. She was still screaming about the chocolate muffin, and at this point, I definitely couldn’t give in because I would be rewarding her naughty behavior. So… I lied and told her that She could no longer go to New York, and that I was calling grandma to come pick her up. I felt kind of bad about it even as I was saying it- even now I still do a little, but I was desperate… and at first it didn’t even work, and then I got worried because I really believe in following through with threats so they know I mean business, but then again, it never even really works with Aurora, no matter how good my track record is with following through. It took about 10 minutes of fake calls to grandma to get her to stop crying, and once she was calmed down, we entered the terminal, and joined the rest of our group.
Tomorrow we leave for New York to visit Monte while he works. He’s already been out there for a month, and we’re going to be visiting him for 2 months! We’re all really excited to see him, and to have a change of scenery for a while. I can’t wait to show the kids the museums, Central Park, the zoo, and the Statue Of Liberty. Although the older girls have been there before, they were so young at the time, I’m not sure they really remember any of it. It’s sure to be a grand adventure, but I’m pretty nervous about the airport and flight. Fortunately, I have the help of my friend and neighbor, Tiffany, she will be joining us for the whole trip to help with the kids.
Thankfully. Because I couldn’t do it without help. I’m mostly worried about getting through airport security with 4 kids. Getting everybody’s shoes off, the stroller collapsed and loaded onto the belt, the two giant car seats for the twins, the carry-on bags, and then of course, getting the actual twins through before they run off while we’re busy doing all of the above, and then chasing them through the airport… which is what Ariel did to me years ago as a toddler when I flew to Europe with her and nobody helped me, rather, they rolled their eyes! It was probably because they were thinking “Wow, that lady is a moron, she can’t even get ONE kid through security without holding up the line. what. an. asshole.”
I haven’t written anything in a long time, it’s been a busy few months, and in August, we took a much needed family trip to Yosemite- CAMPING!!! Yes, actual camping. In a tent. 6 months prior, when I booked this trip, I wasn’t really thinking logistics, I was just thinking about all the great potential memories we would make for our kids. Oh, how fun it will be to go camping IN A TENT in Yosemite, one of the most beautiful places in the world. When I was a kid, we went to Yosemite every summer in a MOTORHOME. It had a bathroom, and a kitchen, and several comfortable beds. So, as the months went by, and this trip got closer, I kind of realized that I have never actually camped in a tent. Ever. Ever? Ever. Apparently camping in an RV isn’t actually “camping”… of course not. So, as the months and weeks got closer to the date, I started to FREAK out. I was nervous about the drive, the bears, setting up camp, keeping the kids clean, the bears, what activities we were going to do- did I mention the bears?? So, I started to gear up, bought the huge tent that would be our home for 2-3 nights, planned on what to pack for clothes, should we bring the stroller? I made reservations 6 months prior, online. Getting reservations at a campground on the valley floor in Yosemite, in the summer, is pretty much like winning the lottery. I actually couldn’t get a spot for the early summer, so when the reservations opened up for mid-August on, we ended up getting a spot in late August, right before school was to start- close call! Not only did we get a campsite in one of the most sought after campgrounds, we got an AMAZING spot, right on the Merced river in Lower Pines. SCORE!! I reserved 2 nights, then quickly realized that it’s a lot of trouble to go through for only two nights, why not make it three? I was lucky to find a third night online, a few minutes later at a different campsite within the same campground, but across the way against the woods. Sweet. I actually figured that we would barely last the first 2nights and be dying to get back to civilization after night one, so it wasn’t a big deal, just a back-up plan.